June 25, 2023

How to Change Your Life: My Perspective

I’ve always looked at life as a series of changes. How to change your life and adapt have always come easily to me. While I come from a culture where change is hard for so many, I crave it. My internal makeup permits me to march to the beat of my own drum without much apology. I’ve never been afraid to start and stop jobs, relationships, or plans that don’t suit me. Life is fluid, ebbs and flows. Whether you want to embrace or fight that fact is a choice. Finding a flow, and finding peace in that flow, has been a key to successfully learning how to adapt and change. I know enough people who tried or keep tying to be the salmon swimming upstream, and it's a tough existence. Let's stop fighting life and figure this thing out together. Are you ready?

Reading a mindset book in the library

Old Mindset Dies Hard

We are born into situations that we have absolutely no control over. When we are young, the need to be accepted by our family and people around us is strong. We fall into the "normal" of what we are taught and go along for years this way. Age is a beautiful thing, though, and as we grow, we can decide if we want to deviate from what we learned or stay the same. None of us thinks just like another person (I.e. our parents), and I have learned that abandoning the old mindset is both terribly difficult but also liberating. In Adam Grant’s book Think Again, he encourages interrupting your thought patterns with new thoughts, questioning yourself. Not just going along with behaviors and thoughts because it’s “what you’ve always done.” Already embracing this sentiment and wanting to improve in it, I feel seen by this book. Let's continue to educate ourselves on this quest of how to change your life, our lives, for the better.
The exact place RWR was born - Chattanooga!

Making Lemonade Out of Lemons

Three years ago, while on a road trip, I started my brand: Roaming with Red. Something happened with a client in my real estate company that rocked my world, and I needed an outlet. It's a long story, but I wanted to curl up and die, as I was already in an emotionally difficult place on a personal level. My world felt like it was caving in and I wanted to climb out of the pit of despair that was my reality. It has happened to most of us. I chose to channel my discomfort into my new project with no clear direction. Roaming with Red was just something that helped me stay sane and expound on my creative expression. Since then, it's provided the most beautiful connections with like-minded people I could ever ask for. While I'm not quitting real estate (yet), I have an outlet when things get tough at my day job. Figuring out how to change your life for the better takes persistence, so persist on. We're in it together.
The crew who loves me no matter what!

Figuring Out Who I Am

Embracing who I am as an individual has been.a.journey. A hard journey, might I add. My family of origin, as many of us know, doesn't like me to be different from them. It's much safer to be homogeneous - safety in numbers. It was beneficial many moons ago when tribes were threatened if they didn't band together. Fast forward, our modern day culture permits us to be different from where we come, if we want it badly enough. My experience has been victorious and sad at the same time. I haven't been met with a warm embrace from my family of origin since my boundaries became clearer. Navigating the path and figuring out how to change your life feels like climbing the highest mountain some days. However, I can confidently say I've never had so many (non-family) members of my squad love and support me wholly, and for who I am. Has it been worth the hardship and heartache? A resounding YES.

Live in and livin' the dream!

What Am I Doing?

How to change your life and continue to change and grow is a big mission for me. The older I get, the more voracious of a learner of life I am. I absolutely get stuck in my old rut of ways at times, but I'm more inclined to catch myself doing it. Shifting has become easier for many reasons. A big one is my faith. I know I'm not on this journey alone, not for one second. It's helped me through the hardest of times and continues to in my everyday. Another is reading my self-improvement books on an almost-daily basis. Learning from experts gives perspective and knowledge we wouldn't necessarily get otherwise. Seeking out other people who want me to level up is another way I show up for myself. Surrounding myself with people who have high expectations of me fills my cup and holds me accountable. Accountability helps us grow and shine. Oh, and therapy therapy therapy. Can't say it enough.


One Day, One Week, One Year at a Time

Putting a plan in place is key. Start small, with tiny things each day to improve your mindset and help in your quest of how to change your life. I started with 3 running lists: daily to-dos; weekly to-dos; and a year-long goal list. Referring back to each of these lists daily and weekly helps me keep my goals in check. There are things on my weekly list that are so small, but I know if I do them each week, my life in a year will look totally different. Learning how to change your life for the better is easier than you think if you just get on board your own train of change. There is nothing more magnificent than looking back in a year and being damn proud of how much you accomplished. Don't let the destination intimidate you. Let the trek, the journey, the climb be your joy. And know, you're not alone. You at least have me cheering you on.

Tomorrow and Tomorrow...and Tomorrow

The magnificent thing about life is that it's a choice. Where we are mentally, physically, emotionally, or spiritually, we are choosing it. Fluidity, how to change, shifting…it’s all part of the program in my makeup, and I know it's in yours if you let it be free. Some of where you are starting is not your choice or your fault, but once you know this, it's your responsibility to make the next move. From my "friend" Mel Robbins' podcast, I learned to think..."what if it all works out?" A secret: it all does work out, so best to stop fighting it. Help your path be as joy-filled, lustrous, and exceptional by continuing to learn how to change your life and improve. Take it from me, your pal Liz, it can be done, and it is beautiful on the other side. I'm living proof.

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